How to respond to an insult beautifully? Assess the situation, psychotype and level of intellectual development of the opponent, and then select one of the pre-prepared phrases. The answer can be witty, simple and offensive, or complex with a veiled offensive meaning. In any case, it is important not to stoop to the level of your opponent, that is, not to resort to direct threats and personalities, and not to resort to obscene words and expressions. Today we will learn to respond to insults, rudeness and rudeness with dignity and grace.
What it is
Conflict situations arise in the service sector, at work or in interpersonal relationships. What matters is how we react to a person in conflict and what the purpose of our response is. Conflict is a two-way problem or a verbal ping pong game.
The girl is rude
Conflict situations suggest different sources of their occurrence. A claim can come from a person who will then extinguish this conflict if it was objective with a non-objective reaction from the interlocutor. Or the offender will be able to end the conflict with a succinct phrase. The scenarios are varied. The main thing is to understand the essence of the bickering and its possible outcome.
Specifics of response
If a person is offended by the words of his interlocutor, then, as part of an instinctive reaction, he hits this ball and sometimes directs even biased conclusions and assessments towards him. In this way, he simply returns the pain that he felt at the time of the attacks or statements. Even if the latter were completely objective.
But this does not always happen. The course of a potential conflict situation may change depending on the awareness of at least one of the participants. When a person hears unpleasant words addressed to him (which are accompanied by actions that are incorrect in his opinion), he has a choice: to respond in kind, not to defend his position, or to stop the interlocutor without continuing the conflict.
The conflict is in full swing
Compared to the first option, the last two seem the most reasonable. But it is also not always appropriate to resolve the conflict with your consent. The outcome depends on the context of the problem and how a dissatisfied person presents it to you. That's why we learn to be rude beautifully. If one of the interlocutors understands that the second person is guilty for objective reasons (and not his subjective assessments), then leaving the situation unresolved is similar to giving him a free hand in the future. With you, and also with other people. This is most relevant for the personal and social spheres of life.
The most obvious and effective technique is often the golden rule: do not make excuses and do not continue the conflict.
Different behavioral tactics
What to do:
Attack tactics for a girl in conflict
- Make fun of your opponent.
- Tactic “attack with questions”: why did you come to such a conclusion, why do you decide that such a division of people is true, what category do you classify yourself in, etc.
- The technique of abstraction is the transfer of a personal insult to the category of some individuals in the general mass. Sample dialogue: - You're an idiot. - Yes, some people in this world are truly idiots.
- Consent and reductio ad absurdum. For example, when someone calls you a homeless person, you can answer: “Yes, I haven’t been included in the Forbes list yet.”
- Attentive listening, which is supported by an interested facial expression and encouraging phrases: “continue”, “Yes, very interesting”, etc.
- Reacting from the position of “I” (if you are on good terms with the person, but he blurted out something out of place). For example, if someone insults you about your clothing choices, don't respond in kind to the other person's style. Here it would be more appropriate to answer something like “I spent a long time choosing this thing. I like her. And your statements offend me.”
- Abrupt interruption of dialogue. The transition to personalities (especially in the social sphere) must be interrupted by a clear and conflict-free departure (from the topic and in terms of physical presence).
- Revealing to a person his true fears. The method is based on the fact that all aggressors project their fears onto other people at the moment of insulting them (paying less attention to other shortcomings).
- Appeal to feelings of guilt. You can tell a person that you treat him well and do not understand his attack.
Learning to be rude beautifully: new and old
- Yes, saving the world with beauty is not a mission for you.
- What, wings have grown behind your back? You need to croak less.
- Teeth are not hair; they will fall off and will not grow back.
- Make-up suits you a la boxer.
- To go crazy, first find your mind.
- For some jokes, gaps appear between the teeth.
- What, were you born with an extra chromosome?
- Lose yourself in horror!
- Stupid! - And you are sharp, I see!
- If you don’t call today, I’ll call you myself. But not for you.
- What can I say about you? Mom didn’t want to, dad didn’t try.
- And you're awesome! - Yes? - No, I’m drunk, and you’re first on the contact list.
- I'm sure you were conceived on a bet!
- Here's an ice cream stick, I imagined it was a horse and galloped away from here.
- The Rh factor is the only positive quality you have.
- Can you pick up teeth from the floor with broken arms?
- What a love you have for nature! It's a shame it's unanswered!
- It’s okay, I’ll just have a couple more glasses of beer and you’ll become a beauty!
- Are you here? Did you forget to close the zoo at night?
- Don't look in your head. There's nothing there.
- Well, it’s understandable that I was born stupid. But what is the reason for the relapse?
- Are we running great or are we tired of living?
- Have you already received a medal for idiocy?
- What, a star? So sit on the Christmas tree and sparkle!
- -Have you found someone? - Yes, instead of you. Are you worried? - No, I also eat sweeteners on a diet.
- Yes, I'm polite. If I send it, I’ll call you back later to find out if I got there...
- No need to ask me about life like that! After all, she is so interesting that you will be disappointed in yourself.
- Look, no matter how you smile with your gums.
If a person learns to respond to attacks and barbs with ease, then after communicating with a rude person, the mood will not deteriorate.
But, self-esteem will steadily grow, and a new perception will improve life in general. Previous articlePreviousNext articleNext
Why do this?
When we meet a conflict-minded person, we can always give him feedback, but with awareness of this situation. The degree of violence of language in this situation depends on the goal we are pursuing. Based on systems psychology, it is concluded that there is always a balance: give and take. If we receive negative energy, then we have a desire to return this pain. And given the conscious choice, we can return this pain in different ways.
Return aggression to the interlocutor
Unconsciously, a person may be guided by his own stereotypes, because of which he will launch a verbal attack, but the effectiveness of such behavior will not even be zero. Negative energy remains in our minds for a long time and multiplies even more. This happens when we share it with our surroundings. We don't let go of negativity from our lives.
You can also return your feelings to a person in a non-violent way. But if there is an understanding that he will adequately perceive it. Otherwise, you just need to clearly and succinctly put the person in his place. Sober him up. Compensation for the negative occurs here too by not hushing up problems and grievances, but the person shows his reluctance to develop the conflict. Such unemotional involvement will protect a person from unnecessary experience of an endless variety of conflicts. Such answers are usually not relevant for people dear to the heart, communication with whom will continue in the future.
Without swearing in smart words
In most cases, swearing is not necessary to control the situation.
You can silence the offender with clever words. For example:
- “I recognized you! You are the same actor who played Shrek!”
- "I hope you're just trying to look worse than you really are."
- “Your words fully reflect the level of your intelligence.”
- “I’m allergic to idiots, please move away.”
- “You don’t need to open your mouth and show me your dirty teeth - I’m not a dentist.”
- “I would like to fight an intellectual duel with you, but I see that you are unarmed.”
- “Just because you look terrible doesn’t give you the right to behave the same way.”
- “Did you come up with this now, or have you been rehearsing it for a week?”
- “Where did this clown come from in a public place?”
- “Don’t rush, you don’t need to actively demonstrate to others your lack of brains.”
- “Don’t worry so much, the day will come when you can still say something smart.”
- “Today, thanks to you, my knowledge has expanded, listening to you, I learned what the highest degree of stupidity is.”
On a note!
If a work colleague constantly insults you, you need to make fun of his low professionalism several times in front of the whole team. You can also propose to the manager his candidacy for the execution of a task in which he understands nothing.
Non-conflict reaction
A person can be returned to the zone of facts and evidence. Stop and try to start a constructive dialogue, asking what is wrong. Leading to a joint conclusion about whether his reaction is adequate and whether his assessment is objective. Does a person rely on real or imaginary facts? However, it is not always possible to do this if a person is directly and unswervingly determined to behave boorishly.
Alternative response to rudeness:
The girl tries to keep calm
- maintaining calm;
- trying to understand;
- demonstration of politeness;
- transition to constructiveness;
- trying on the image of a bore;
- ignoring.
The listed points are relevant for their application in the sphere of public life or at work with clients and colleagues. Well, with the most dear people it is important to say in response to a hysterical attack: “I love you.” Of course, there is no need to avoid the problem. You should understand the essence of a person's problems as much as possible if you are interested in continuing interpersonal communication.
Wit: we joke with taste
Many people admire the ability of some people to easily and quickly find witty answers to rudeness and rudeness. But learning to respond to rude people with humor is not so difficult.
First of all, you should learn to calmly perceive conflict situations. Well, the man is not in good spirits, and he didn’t manage to get an education, so why waste your nerves and time on him now? Of course, people with higher education are also rude. But don’t forget: an intelligent person will not stoop to banal rudeness and insults.
If you think in advance about how to respond to an insult funny and with sarcasm, then ending such dialogues will be much easier. And you will cheer up those around you.
If someone suddenly starts bullying you, you can simply say the phrase: “Quiet! What are these sounds? Oh, no, it seemed. The wind, probably." At the same time, calmly continue to do your business. The impudent guy will cool down. And if suddenly such a “dialogue” takes place in front of witnesses, we can safely say that they will admire your calmness and sense of humor.
If you are wondering how to respond to insults wittily in any situation, it would be useful to remember a couple of standard expressions, for example:
- The lower the intelligence, the louder the insults.
- Yes, they say that beauty will save the world. But this is not about you.
- There is no need to make a fool out of you. Ready-made material.
- In addition to a higher education, it is a good idea to have a secondary consideration.
Individual response phrases
Here are humiliating and threatening responses, as well as conventionally ironic ones.
Examples with different contexts:
The girl is rude beautifully
- in order to talk with you on the same level, I will have to sit down;
- mind like a shell / memory like a fish - three seconds;
- in order for you to convince me, you will finally have to say something smart;
- The only positive thing about you, apparently, is the “Rh factor”;
- your right to your own point of view should not trample on my right to protection from idiocy;
- It’s easier for you to silently pass for smart;
- I'm sorry for not living up to your personal stereotypes;
- your manner of communication brings back memories of the dashing nineties and tasteless crimson jackets;
- the further into the thicket, the angrier the woodpeckers;
- Look, God is not alien to the human, since He approaches the creation of individual personalities with such humor.
The main purpose of all such statements is to repel the attack while stopping further conflict. To do this, you need not to overdo it with aggression, which will become a catalyst for further proceedings. Rather, you need to ensure that the person understands the meaninglessness of the dialogue, as well as your disinterest in it. Or he was simply taken aback by your statements, realizing that he was wrong.
Psychologist's opinion
The options for dealing with a verbal aggressor and a boor are different. If you understand some of the basics of physiognomy, then you can see that a person is always like this by nature. And at least not take what he said personally. Nevertheless, it is still necessary to put such an individual in his place. In this case, it is necessary to see in time the potential danger emanating from such a person. Will he be able to move from words to action? This is also evidenced by the specificity of speech with short aggressive phrases like orders, active gestures, similar in the specifics of movements to throwing objects.
In general, you should always defend your well-being even in dialogue with different people. Your safety, your point of view, your dignity. This is required not because of selfish manifestations of your character, but to create a comfortable living atmosphere. At the same time, the development of the conflict does not fit into the framework of the task.
What to do
An incorrect reaction when our breath stops (that is, we are taken aback or scared) or we also fall into an inadequate state. In this situation, we can state an absolute loss. Not in front of another person, but in front of yourself. This development of events will not be to our advantage. We will feel depressed, disappointed in ourselves, or aggressive in the future.
It is wrong to underestimate others. Perhaps this is a psychopathic person or simply a physically stronger person. You should think not only about a harsh response, but also about your own safety.
If conflict situations occur frequently (for example, work involves increased stress), then the rules of behavior must be determined initially. To do this, we learn to be rude beautifully. Or we just learn to react correctly instantly. At that moment when a person presses, one must imagine oneself in a cocoon. This does not mean that you need to physically distance yourself and just remain silent. This is a psychological cocoon that a boor cannot penetrate. You straighten your shoulders and calmly put him in his place.
Examples of how I respond to insults and rudeness
I use two methods: ignore (if we are talking about insults on the Internet) and psychological aikido M.E. Litvak (for real life and the Internet). Actually, I can’t say that I encounter something like this often, but rather very rarely. But if I have to, then I calmly agree with any characteristic and select a couple of more unpleasant epithets for myself. After all, I know that this does not apply to me, and with such an answer I save time and energy for things that are more productive and useful for me than feeding someone’s sick pride or low self-esteem. And if someone turns out to be very persistent, then I can always answer: “I feel sorry for you.” Well, or some of those phrases that we have already considered.